Ten things or less

Ten things that I hate the most

1. Reptiles
2. Being away from Honey
3. Needing money
4. My legs
5. My hair now
6. Lies
7. Men who bitch
8. Slow people
9. Sad ending
10. Period
11. Needles
12. Death
    

(okay okay. Ten things or less. Well, I always have the tendency to push it)

Ten things I want to keep until I die

1. My family
2. Greeting cards from people who appreciate me
3. My hard earned furniture
4. The first mobile from Honey
5. My beautiful dresses
6. My ring
7. My watch
   
8. Everything Honey has given me.

“Oh please sit down, how do you do, this job’s for me, the rest is poo”

Some people said that all the beautiful girls can have life for free, but I don’t want to be a beautiful girl. I want to pay. Oh yes. ^lol^

This. This whole thing. It’s not my obsession anymore. I am retired. One thing I am sure, I am not setting my foot here anymore, on my craving. We live, we work, we are just getting started, we’ll never see each other again.

Later babes. I love to hang but it’s school night. Que bueno!

Day 14: I am sick or stupid?

I was trying to make some Milo after vomited various times when I overheard this conversation between my CEO and my GM in living room;

CEO: How is she? What did the doctor say?
GM: She is okay. No sickness. Nothing. But she has been vomiting continuously for too many days.
CEO: See, I told you that she will be okay. Look at us (bangla), we never fall sick.
GM: Yea.
CEO: That's why I told you not to take her to 'real' private hospital. It will only cost money.
GM: That's true. The clinic was good enough. She didn't even know that haha!

Hmmm so I was taken to a chekai and cheapo clinic not 'real private hospital'? And he is right cause I REALLY didn't realised that.

What can I say. I am the stupid one.

Day 14: Science has proven it

Nothing much to say about the medical report. It says, I am perfectly healthy. The first one said, I have sepsis. This one says I am healthy. Honey insisted for the 3rd one but I say, no I am not going to give more blood for them to consume.

So I just vomit for fun. And this fever is not real too. The body aches because not enough walking in malls. And the itchiness, maybe because I am lack of sex.

Later babes!

The Thirteenth Day of Being Away. The Twelfth Day of Being Sick

Good day!

I am off to another private hospital soon. We can't trust the previous doctor so my CEO decided to bring me to another one. As promised, I have finished up my last dosage last night. Fever is still bugging me. Vomited until the sink got jammed and caused my GM to call for plumber again this morning. Scratched the whole body until bleeding. But yet, still here and smiling *grin* :)

Later babes!

Itchy!

I am having very severe itchiness. Whole body is full with this;

I thought it's mosquitoes' bite but then it started to be watery and very itchy especially at my thighs. And to think of it, I wear long tights to sleep so it can't be mosquitoes right? Let's pray for me okay? :)

And this is my meal for today's lunch wheee :))))

Finishing the dosage

I will finish my dosage of medications tonight. So if the fever and all the siblings still there next morning, I will just go see the same doctor and do another blood test.

Worry not. Am okay :)

Fairy Tale

"When I was little girl my mum will lock me up in my room if I was bad. Which was very often. When I was there I will think that I was a princess who being locked in a tower by a wicked woman. I will imagine that there's a prince charming who will come on his white horse to rescue me"

In those years, I too (like many others) had relationship issue. I was hoping for a 'fairy tale' but he said he's not capable of offering that but at the end he became the knight like in my fairy tale.

Fairy tale is too beautiful to let go. And it keeps us going.

Now, say hi to the prince and princess!

~toodles!

Productive Day

Listening to Jenny, I am now trying to do what I could not do when I was home.

I am brushing up my languages. I used to be able to speak Japanese pretty fluently. A little of Swedish. Some Arabic. Understood Thai. And still picking up on Cantonese (not a language I know) and now I started my Bangla lesson.

Pretty productive day! :)

So here something for you!

1. Ami/Amar - I
2. Amra - We
   
3. Tumi/Apni/Tui - You

• Apni - Older Person
• Tumi - Younger Person
• Tui - Same Age

Ami khu dhar to - I am hungry
Amra khu shar to - We are hungry
Ami ashus to - I am tired
Ami/amar mata gorum - I am crazy

voila!

*giggle*

~toodles!

When I didn't cry when I should be crying

Today I got very ill. So I went to see two doctors. The first one I saw was cheapo thus I was not satisfied so I went to see another doctor at a private hospital. Being a typical Malaysian, we tend to trust private doctors more than those from normal chambers.

I was diagnosed to have blood infection and been prescribed with some stronger medications which we need to buy ourselves at a local pharmacy.

To divert my mind off emotional stuffs, I on'd the TV and guess what's on it? It was Titanic on HBO. What a coincidence ah? Titanic on V-day :P.

I have never watched the ending of Titanic (I have watched this show, without the ending for more than 10 times) as I thought it is too sad for a beautiful story and I didn't want to cry. But today, I did. I mean I watched it and I didn't cry.



"A woman's heart is like a deep ocean of secret"

We can sit down and listen to music and start crying. Hehe :)

February 13, 2009 - Outing

Pictures of yesterday's outing. I no need to explain no more. I was down with fever, my temperature was 40°. And it was not that fun. I made it look like so much fun in pictures because that's what I do for living. Now, stop pouting!

~toodles.

Depressed la wei!

Being alone on Valentines' Day (or birthday) is fucking depressed. For a day that is supposed to be shared with your loved ones, it can be a huge disappointment to you. Romantic dinners, roses, chocolates, diamond rings and overflowing depression are all the norm on Valentines' day. Yes for many, instead of being happy, appreciated and loved on this particular day, it ends up bringing sadness, depression, self-doubt and loneliness.

If I am in Sydney or Singapore or KL or even at any more civilised places, being in this situation, I will go out clubbing, treat & pamper myself. Create any wonderful surprise. But, but I am in fucking Bangladust!

Quit?

I have just taken my medicine. Drank lotsa water. My temperature is quite high. And the cough and sore throat is getting worse. God, I really wanna go home. I know I keep discouraging my own self. I thought I continually making progress in terms of my work. But no. This sickness is making me really emotional. Although I know I have must be single minded. That I should drive for the one thing which I have decided.

At one point of time, I planned not to take care of myself so that I can fall really ill. I prayed to be really sick. Serious sickness. Got admitted into ICU than I can go back home.

I know. I know. Okay.

If I decide to go back before management decide to bring me back, that means I quit. And if that happens;

1. I will be fired which I do not want cause I want this job. I just hate this three months business trip
2. After got fired, we will have trouble paying debts. And bills.
3. It will effect honey's job because we are working for the same company.
4. I will surely been labeled as 'incapable person'. No more respect for me.
   
5. I will probably been restricted from attending company's events or even coming to office.
6. Out of all this, I won't earn anything. No respect, no money, no career.
   

So to those who are reading, please give me some advices. On how to survive. So I wont need to quit.

Life seems much much brighter when you have something to work for, and something to look forward to :) ~Bwooie

Defining LOVE

Apart from the phone problems, I was also very sick yesterday. I started to feel feverish then cough then sore throat. Then what else? Crying til eyes got swollen.

Okay. Okay. What's new on this blog lately? All about being emotional. So? You can tell it to my face.

Anyway, last night after I finished my training, we talked online until 3am. Being so paranoid of the 'unreachable' situation plus my health's problem, Honey got all so worried and decided to make me smiling. Hee heee :D
Define L.O.V.E.

This is not easy because he is handling his biggest project in his whole-career-life which not allowing him to take leave or even to be sick plus we are supposed to be very thrifty. But since Air Asia is having promo and his wifey is so mengada-ngada wanting him to come over, he just typed in [www.airasia.com] at the browser and purchased the tix.

My dirty little secret? Strip. ~toodles.

Unreachable

I was having problem with both my phones just now. I was out of reach for hours and Honey was worried sick back at home. I have two phones. Two numbers.

1. My Bangla number: I am using a Nokia (don't know what model) phone loaned by company which has a bug. After certain amount of SMSes this phone will auto block the incoming SMSes unless we manually off/on the phone. Honey has detected this problem last few days when it first happened to me so we both make it as practice to off/on daily. But today eventhough I have done the off/on function, I still couldn't receive any SMS and to make it worse, today I couldn't receive calls too.
2. My Maxis number which is on roaming: I am using Honey's old W810i because my phone was rosak'd long time ago. This phone is old enough to be dumped into rubbish bin but it has also been very loyal and good to us. It always turns off by itself whenever it feels like it so I just need to on it back. But today, it is totally dead. Can't be on'd. God bless you, urm (it used to have a name, I cant remember anymore).
   

Problem #1 (can't receive incoming calls + SMSes) was because bad service provider so now I switched to another number by different service provider. The bug in this Nokia phone is still there so daily off/on is still needed.

Problem #2 is unsolvable for the time being. Any fund for a new phone is much appreciated.

Honey, I am alright. I love you too much that I wont let anything to happen to me. Don't worry okay?

God bless me.

February 6 & 7

Since there are two loving authors in this blog now, you will be reading a lot of updates. From both sides, hubby and wifey as we promised to keep each other updated :)

I haven't really had the time to write about my life here in Bangla from the night I touched down until now. From the time when I spent most of my time crying until the time I spent either being out visiting lotsa offices or training my students & staffs (and also at some time, crying - still).

This post will be filled up with lots of pictures. Most of the pictures were taken in our car when it's moving cause when we are out we try not to go out from car unless when we have reached our destinations. Cause it's too dusty, you can't even count how many pimples do I have on my face (and some other parts of my body) now. The quality of the pictures for this batch is not so good because I was not in the mood to keep adjusting the setting on the first and second day. I was lazy and I was homesick.

* we are 2 hours behind Malaysia time.

Let's start with day 1;

That's Dhaka Airport for you!

Upon arriving at airport (12.30am local time - we departed from KLIA at 10.30pm - Malaysia time), we have been detained by the immigration because we were carrying some products as sample and they thought that we are smugglers. Hee hee, see! How do you expect me not to cry if the first thing happened when I touched down is being detained by weird fellas who didn't even understand English? We didn't manage to settle it there so we just left our products and contacted our local contacts to handle for us as it was almost 1.30am.

This is the bloody idiot immigration fella who simply tahan people and take people's stuffs and keep for himself (he took one bottle of whiskey and three packets of Dunhill ciggies from their own people, a local who just came back from working in Malaysia)

We had been picked up by two gentlemen who are our ambassadors here. Arrived at our rented apartment at almost 2.00am. Mind you, they don't have road laws. They just drive!

That's our kitchen with stocks I carried from home :)

My toilet which can only fit half of Honey :P. Check out my toiletries that Honey bought and packed for me :)

The living + dining hall

And lastly my tiny room!

I didn't sleep well that night. Honey, Isaac and home were in my mind :(

The next day we went to our CEO's office and had some beriyani rice for lunch!

Salad; cucumber, lime and green chili. Haha!

Beriyani rice with chicken and egg inside

Curry beef which tasted so good :D

And lastly toothpick on hot herbs. The herbs are meant to be eaten to neutral the smell of your mouth after eating.
And the toothpick are not to be eaten.

I will write about the next day in my next entry. Lazy to type already lah. Now need to go make some Milo while waiting for my baby to come online. Toodles~

Adapting

Question: How can a girl who went down into a rabbit hole, pluming into it but came out unchanged?

The answer: No she doesn’t!

I was thinking that all the plans I have made in my life went terribly wrong when I decided to come here until I came across this;

Life happens when you are busy making other plans. ~John Lennon

So, trying to adapt to Bangladesh's dirty environment, slow progress and my terrible homesick.

A little bruised. A little humbled. A little smarter.

Day 1 & Day 2

You want to see Bangla?

I went out with one of our staffs to take passport size pictures to apply for my internet connection. Since he doesn't own a car and our driver (yes we have a car and a driver and a maid too) is out fetching my other associate to shop for some furniture, I decided why not just take rickshaws (eventhough I have been warned by my bosses in Malaysia not to do this) and try to take some pictures. It was very scary and dusty so it was not so comfortable for me to take pictures using my big DSLR cause I was so scared and not comfortable as everybody stared at me.

Me on the rickshaw. Paid BDT 20 per trip. Do your math!

After taking my photographs which cost me BDT200

They are selling some food which looks like popiah at roadsides. Dared not to try.

These two kids were very cute. I was having trouble with camera setting
so I needed to snap like 10 pictures but they stayed still and smiling :)

This is the broadband & cable TV wires. So old school. Wires are everywhere. Wonder how they know which one is which one.

Will write more later.

This is too tough

If you ask me how am I doing. I am not sure how to say. I can't say I am not okay cause I am safe here but I don't want to say that I am okay cause I am not. Not.

I cry most of the time unless when I am busy with work which is very stressful and slow.

The rest, will be spent crying and crying.

Hubby is doing everything he can to calm me down to support me to be there for me. Literally 'be there for me' cause he is not here.

I just want him. That's all.

Bangladesh High Commission, KL

Went to apply for my visa at Bangladesh High Commission located at Lorong Damai, KL.

Being there, I thought I flew off to Bangla without realising it. It felt like Bangla but Auntie Choon said it's not even close.

They make their people who just touched down feel like home by selling stuffs in their bangla ways. Just outside the Bangladesh High Commission's entrance. In KL, Malaysia.

And this is their filing system.

The empty counter we waited for almost an hour cause the staff went to the back to get another file. For almost an hour.

All the best Yan!

Love Letter To My Hubby

This is the love letter I wrote to my hubby:

#1 is ticked.

My favorite place to be is inside of your hugs, in your arms where it's warm and tender. Where I can really smell your body odor.

I just wish I don't have to go. I just wish I don't have a dream. Cause because of this dream, I am doing this to you. Just because I couldn't wear the black suit, now I will be wearing the Bengali suit.

I just want to wake up with you and I know that's what you would want too. There is so much we have to do. There is so much more we want to do.

I may not get to chat with you as often as I like. I may not get to hold you in my arms all through the nights. So Honey, whenever you feel a warm breeze brush against you, that's the kiss I blew to you. And when you miss me, just think that I am just inside the closet hiding from you like everytime I sulk.

You know it's true.