Thursday, February 12, 2009

Quit?

I have just taken my medicine. Drank lotsa water. My temperature is quite high. And the cough and sore throat is getting worse. God, I really wanna go home. I know I keep discouraging my own self. I thought I continually making progress in terms of my work. But no. This sickness is making me really emotional. Although I know I have must be single minded. That I should drive for the one thing which I have decided.

At one point of time, I planned not to take care of myself so that I can fall really ill. I prayed to be really sick. Serious sickness. Got admitted into ICU than I can go back home.

I know. I know. Okay.

If I decide to go back before management decide to bring me back, that means I quit. And if that happens;
  1. I will be fired which I do not want cause I want this job. I just hate this three months business trip
  2. After got fired, we will have trouble paying debts. And bills.
  3. It will effect honey's job because we are working for the same company.
  4. I will surely been labeled as 'incapable person'. No more respect for me.
  5. I will probably been restricted from attending company's events or even coming to office.
  6. Out of all this, I won't earn anything. No respect, no money, no career.
So to those who are reading, please give me some advices. On how to survive. So I wont need to quit.

Life seems much much brighter when you have something to work for, and something to look forward to :) ~Bwooie
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9 comments:

  1. darling, what about treating your business trip as one of your holiday? :P yeah, i know it's a bad idea when u stuck in Bangla but then at least u will not that stressed up. plus, think of u as the only breadwinner/superhero in the family and make a lot of money out of it. a bit nonsense + childish kan my idea? ~sigh~ actually, i juz want to make u smile.. :S lol.

    anyway,take care of your health girl.. isaac and seb need you to be healthy for them. ok sayang?

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  2. Hey babe. It's actually a good idea but there's nothing I can do here babe. It's so dirty and I avoid to go out. One because it's too dirty and can only make me sick. Two, the way they drive here is so dangerous. I am always so scared. Everytime I go out, I will think that there's 50/50 % I will come back alive.

    And as for earning money, I do think that way that's why I am still trying. Seb is of course the breadwinner but I try to think that I am helping him by doing this. So at least, I am contributing something for our family. You know I always want to become somebody in my career.It's a good idea, babe. Thanks so much for always supporting me. You are always so sweet :D

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  3. you cant be in a relationship and act like ur single...too bad...thats
    life...deal with it!wat the fuck are u doing??? i wanna kill you!! dun you do this to sookQ

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  4. What the fuck are you talking about?

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  5. Soochee: Did you type in the wrong comment box?? Yan is married (or "in a relationship", as you called it) and acts married. She doesn't act single.

    Gal, I don't know what to say. Except that, from what I've heard, this part is usually the hardest part to get over, since its the first time you're away from all the things that are familiar to you. Its too bad that your company sent you alone there. That's just a recipe for depression. You should've had at least one teammate to work with so you could keep up each other's spirits.

    And as for not daring to venture out at night, that's completely understandable. Maybe you need to find something to take your mind off the distance? Anything you wanted to do, that you couldn't do before cos you didn't have enough time? Like read a few books (you can buy them online), play some Sims, do some cross stitch?

    Okay, the cross stitch is for last resort la...

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  6. Hey Jenny,

    Soochee typed in the right comment box just that she didn't pay attention on what's going on :)

    Ah anyway, before I came here, I thought 'this' should be alright because after seeking some advices from some people they said sometimes we need to do 'this'. Being away from our partner once a while so we can create the 'missing each other' feeling and that can help to improve the relationship.

    To be honest, I don't know why did I use that reason/advice to come here as we were always in good condition. We love and miss each other like we are still dating. I mean we are not that old or dull yet to desperately need a way out to create the excitement in our relationship like some others. We do miss each other even though when he was out for events that I decided not to follow.

    But, I stupidly listened to people that this 'coming to bangla' can give more excitement to us.

    But NO. It doesn't. It cause more emotional crisis and depression. Hmm. Especially when night falls.

    And now I am trying to do something as advised, to distract my emotions from thinking too much. I am writing a journal of our love. I have always wanted to do this but when I was home, we always sticked to each other, I couldn't do this. I hope this will help :)

    Thanks Jenny. You are so sweet :D

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  7. elo, i think u shouldnt give up. try for your max. and u can always write/uptdate us. tht will keep u going. u are the toughest gal i've ever known so this is nothing ok. on your health, i hope u will get better if not, no choice, come back. u are too valuable to be lost.

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  8. Don't give up hunny, I support you 200% percent in what you do!

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  9. Is, thanks :)

    Honey, hey hey I love you too much I guess :P

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